Author Topic: Official 4BangerJP Joke Thread  (Read 24192 times)

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Offline dexetr30

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Re: Joke Thread *NSFW*
« Reply #45 on: July 10, 2007, 05:07:51 PM »
A man and his wife are awakened at 3 o'clock in the morning by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a Drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.

"Not a chance," says the husband, "it is three o'clock in the morning!" He slams the door and returns to bed.

Who was that?" asked his wife.

Just some drunk guy asking for a push," he answers.

Did you help him?" she asks.

No, I did not, it is three in the morning and it is pouring outside!"

Well, you have a short memory," says his wife. "Can't you remember about three months ago when we broke down and those two guys helped us?" "I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!"

The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pouring rain. He calls out into the dark, "Hello, are you still there?"

Yes," comes back the answer.

Do you still need a push?" calls out the husband.

Yes, please!" comes the reply from the dark.

Where are you?" asks the husband.

"Over here on the swing!" replies the drunk
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Re: Joke Thread *NSFW*
« Reply #46 on: July 11, 2007, 05:31:36 AM »
 :lol:^That's good^ :lol:

Jesse-James

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Re: Semi-Official Joke Thread
« Reply #47 on: August 24, 2007, 02:46:05 PM »
Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited At a
 party.  After several drinks, one of the men had to use the rest room.
 Those who remained talked about their kids.
 The first guy said, "My son is my pride and joy.  He started working at
 a successful company at the bottom of the barrel.  He studied Economics
and Business Administration and soon began to climb the corporate ladder and
now he's the president of the company.  He became so rich that he gave his
best friend a top of the line Mercedes For his birthday."
 The second guy said, "Darn, that's terrific!  My son is also my pride
 and joy. He started working for a big airline, and then went to flight
 school to become a pilot. Eventually he became a partner in the
 company, where he owns the majority of its assets. He's so rich that
 he gave his best friend a brand new jet for his birthday."
 The third man said: "Well, that's terrific!  My son studied in the best
 universities and became an engineer.  Then he started his own
 construction company and is now a multimillionaire.  He also gave away
 something very nice and expensive to his best friend for his
 birthday: A 30,000 square foot mansion."
 The three friends congratulated each other just as the fourth returned
 from the restroom and asked: "What are all the congratulations for?"
 One of the three said: "We were talking about the pride we feel for
 the successes of our sons.  What about your son?"
 The fourth man replied: "My son is gay and makes a living Dancing as a
 stripper at a nightclub."
 The three friends said:  "What a shame...what a disappointment."
 The fourth man replied:  "No, I'm not ashamed.  He's my son and I love
him.  And he hasn't done too bad either.  His birthday was two weeks ago,
and he received a beautiful 30,000 square foot mansion, a brand new jet and
a top of the line Mercedes from his three boyfriends. 
 

Jesse-James

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Re: Absolutely Official 4BangerJP Joke Thread
« Reply #48 on: August 25, 2007, 12:40:59 PM »

Offline Jeffy

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Re: Official 4BangerJP Joke Thread
« Reply #49 on: August 26, 2007, 12:24:22 PM »
Camel Toads huh?  She must live under a rock.   :roflol:
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lanulos89

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Re: Official 4BangerJP Joke Thread
« Reply #50 on: August 26, 2007, 03:54:09 PM »
 :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol:

Offline SKI BOY

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Re: Official 4BangerJP Joke Thread
« Reply #51 on: September 07, 2007, 04:44:50 AM »
from Letterman...

They say President Bush, once he leaves office, is going to open a 'Think Tank'!!

That's like Michael Vick opening an 'Animal Shelter'!!!
Ski Boy

" It ain't broke til you can't fix it no more "

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Bluemoon

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Re: Official 4BangerJP Joke Thread
« Reply #52 on: October 01, 2007, 11:47:15 AM »
A little boy walks into his parents' room to see his mom on top of
his  dad bouncing up and down. the mom sees her son and quickly dismounts,
worried about what her son has seen. She dresses quickly and goes to 
find him. 

The son sees his mom and asks, "What were you and Dad doing?" 

The mother replies, "Well, you know your dad has a big tummy and 
sometimes I have to get on top of it and help flatten it." 

"Your wasting your time,"said the boy. 

"Why is that?" the mom asked puzzled. 

"Well when you go shopping the lady next door comes over and gets on 
her knees and blows it right back up."   :hump:

Jesse-James

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Re: Official 4BangerJP Joke Thread
« Reply #53 on: December 06, 2007, 04:44:23 PM »

Rokcrwln

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Re: Official 4BangerJP Joke Thread
« Reply #54 on: December 06, 2007, 07:25:06 PM »
I THINK YOU'RE THE FATHER OF ONE OF MY KIDS...

A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving
at him. She says hello. He's rather taken aback because he can't place
where he knows her from.

So he says, 'Do you know me?' To which she replies, 'I think you're
the father of one of my kids.'

 Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been
unfaithful to his wife and says, 'Are you the stripper from my bachelor party
that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while
your partner whipped my butt with wet celery???'

 She looks into his eyes and says calmly, 'No, I'm your son's
teacher.'

Jesse-James

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Re: Official 4BangerJP Joke Thread
« Reply #55 on: December 08, 2007, 01:50:19 AM »
*NSFW Language*

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/DOq-8kvAV3o&amp;rel=1" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer" class="bbc_link bbc_flash_disabled new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/DOq-8kvAV3o&amp;rel=1</a>

Offline Jeffy

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Re: Official 4BangerJP Joke Thread
« Reply #56 on: December 08, 2007, 08:33:20 PM »


Wow, that happened back in 2002...   :lol:
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"If the motor car were invented today, there is absolutely no way that any government in the world would let normal members of the public drive one."

Offline Mozman68

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Re: Official 4BangerJP Joke Thread
« Reply #57 on: December 17, 2007, 02:19:17 PM »
I like this one....

2009 Audi S5....what....its 4wd...sort of....

jeepheap

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Re: Official 4BangerJP Joke Thread
« Reply #58 on: December 17, 2007, 02:44:14 PM »
nice! it's funny the other day i drove past the local hummer dealership, and out front was a built jeep on the hill in front while all the hummers were still onn pavement. haha.

Offline Jeffy

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Re: Official 4BangerJP Joke Thread
« Reply #59 on: December 23, 2007, 03:15:42 PM »
Youtube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZNlr60GXH5OlKIFrT7P6mg
My Jeep: http://4bangerjp.com/forums/index.php?topic=2783.0
"If the motor car were invented today, there is absolutely no way that any government in the world would let normal members of the public drive one."